Ra Discoursing!

Tuesday 23:43 p.m.
Speaking to flatheids over the course of more than two hours without recourse to drink or drugs is enough to make me lose the will to live. It used to be the same long times ago with straights. The nicety nice. Folk sitting, having cups of tea and looking nervous, for hours and hours and hours. And that was just moi!

After having two full days at the jobbie ... there's nobody there, Jack. Just me and the computery thing and the passage of time. I say hello once a day ... I really feel the need for some empowerment.

So you're skint. Being skint isn't really too much of a problem if you can just tell theflatheids to fung off. Being skint, if you're trying to be nice, is a misery. My problems with money don't involve the money, they involve having to do things on account of trying to be nice with the rich basturns, and the evil bourgeois, and the flatheids.

I want to be skint. It would be better if everyone around me was as skint as me, and then they would go back into their burrows, and get depressed, and never come out again. I don't want to be skint when I feel that I have to justify myskintness to folk. I'm trying to tell them to fung off and leave me alone. I'm trying to be nice. I really hate nice people. I'll have to stop being nice and just tell them to fung off!

I've got enough money. I can get stoned and drunk as much as I like. I could grow grass and make home brew if it came to that. Pots of money really.

The sweetie eating, evil bourgeois and otherflatheids just have to be told to fung off! Just fung off! If you don't want to meditate with me, just fung off and leave me alone!

Apart from the crabbitness .... three really good things occurred today. Or good things occurred three times.
1) Ra bliss was so full and thick, the breathe was very slight, the thoughts as they arose were very slow ....this is a difference from a couple of weeks ago. I think I can go there now. But not right now.
2) The seats in the cinema for the Bette Davis movie, Now, Voyager, were lousy, yet ra bliss came on and I started to get quite warm. It's better if the seats are good and it's a foreign language film .... one day I will take my noise blockers to the movies .... but I had to wonder about ra heat.
3) The third good thing is that I cannot remember what it was. There were a lot of good bits today, but they were all concerned with investigating ra bliss. The breath sheaf is the one to gambol in. This getting wrecked stuff is completely useless by comparison.